Too Old To Cut The Mustard
Marlene Dietrich and Rosemary Clooney (1952)
Submitted by Ralph
Both:
Too old, too old
He's too old to cut the mustard anymore
He's gettin' too old, too old
He's too old to cut the mustard anymore
Marlene:
Once I kissed a millionaire
Ran my fingers through his hair
The whole thing turned out pretty grim
'Cause none of his hair belonged to him
Both:
Too old, too old
He's too old to cut the mustard anymore
He's gettin' too old, too old
He's too old to cut the mustard anymore
Rosemary:
A gent I know with a big sedan
Swore he was an army man
But he got dressed up, fit to kill
In the uniform he wore at the Bunker Hill
Both:
Too old, too old
He's too old to cut the mustard anymore
He's gettin' too old, too old
He's too old to cut the mustard anymore
Marlene:
I entertained an actor I know
The moon was high and the lights were low
He said I'd like to play the scene
But it's time to drink my Ovaltine
Both:
Too old, too old
He's too old to cut the mustard anymore
He's gettin' too old, too old
He's too old to cut the mustard anymore
Rosemary:
It seems that every man you meet
Wants to sweep you off his feet
Marlene:
But gals, before you do submit
Make him show his birth certificate
Both:
Too old, too old
He's too old to cut the mustard anymore
He's gettin' too old, too old
He's too old to cut the mustard anymore
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
A second version of
TOO OLD TO CUT THE MUSTARD
When I was young I had lots of pep,
I could get around I didn't need no help.
But since I'm old and a-gettin' gray,
The people look at me and say....
CHORUS:
Too old, too old,
He's too old to cut the mustard anymore.
He's a-gettin' too old, he's done got too old,
He's too old to cut the mustard anymore.
I used to could jump just like a deer,
But now I need a new landing gear.
I used to could jump a picket fence,
But now I'm lucky if I jump an inch.
Because I'm...
(CHORUS)
When I was young I had an automobile,
I'd scoot myself right under that wheel.
I had to fight the gals off with a stick,
But now they say, "Oh, he makes me sick,
Because he's..."
(CHORUS)